Parental rights in transition: What the reform draft would mean for parents after a separation

A separation is a legal procedure and a personal rupture, often both for children. The law that determines who decides for a child and who sees the child when dates back in its basic structure to 1997. The last comprehensive reform is the Parental Rights Reform Act of 16 December 1997; since then only occasional amendments have been made.

What would affect parents

Protection against violence. For the first time a comprehensive concept is to be placed within parental custody and visitation law. In cases of violence against the other parent, visitation may be excluded if necessary to avert a risk to that parent's physical integrity. The presumption that contact with both parents serves the child's welfare shall not apply in cases of domestic violence. Protection from witnessed violence is expressly included in the child's welfare.

Joint custody. When unmarried parents mutually acknowledge paternity, they shall receive joint custody without further declaration, provided no one objects. Previously, publicly notarised custody declarations were additionally required.

Care models. The residence model, asymmetric and symmetric shared‑care models are to be named in the legislation for the first time, without giving precedence to any. During their own care period each parent shall be allowed to decide everyday matters independently.

Agreements. The draft aims to clarify that parents may make agreements concerning custody and visitation to strengthen consensual solutions and provide legal certainty for third parties as well, for example regarding collection from kindergarten or school.

Consideration. The duty of consideration shall replace the previous duty of proper conduct.

What remains open

Maintenance law is not mentioned in the ministry's press release. How a shared‑care model is to be assessed under maintenance law therefore remains a separate question. The debate is also not concluded: the German Women's Council welcomes the initiative, calls for further refinements and considers the gender‑neutral definition of domestic violence untenable.

Our position

The draft clearly relies on agreement, which aligns with what guides us in counselling: a judgment ends a legal dispute, not necessarily the conflict. Parents remain connected as long as their children are growing up. It is helpful to distinguish between positions and interests, as outlined in the Harvard negotiation concept. Those who argue about “shared‑care model, yes or no” are negotiating positions. Those who ask what the child needs on a Tuesday evening are negotiating interests, and that can be discussed.

Nevertheless, mediation is not a panacea. It relies on voluntariness and a minimum level of safety. Practitioners explicitly warn against schematically pushing for parental agreement in cases of domestic violence. Where violence is present, the aim is not agreement but protection. We place this principle at the forefront of every mediation.

Until adoption, the existing law remains in force. Those undergoing a separation need not wait for the legislation, as many issues can already be organised in a structured and consensual manner today.

This article provides general information and does not replace individual legal advice. Date: 20 September 2026. Sources: Federal Ministry of Justice, press release 35/2026; Federal Bar Association, newsletter 11/2026; statements from the German Women's Council and the Federal Association of State Youth Offices.